Having someone special in your life is usually good. Of course, there are good and bad times but this is part of life. Relationships begin and sometimes they are over.
I always believe that respect and honesty come first in a relation. Of course, Love does matter and it is important.
Relationships are where people feel loved, comfortable and, safe.
However, sometimes people do not feel safe in a relationship. Even if they are ok at that time, they have worries about their future as they never want to be alone. For this reason, they would like to keep some close contacts to be in a relationship.
So, what is monkey branching?
Monkey branching is a condition when a person pretends to be single and flirting with other people. This person keeps others at a distance that there is no actual dating or cheating but almost being in a relationship with them.
Keeping contact can be in any form. Just through messaging, having a drink with someone, or even teasing a co-worker. The point is having multiple choices at hand after a possible breakup.
PS: For future reference, I will call the person who is monkey branching as a woman. However, all genders equally are monkeys.
Monkey branching occurs in a few possible conditions.
The first one is, she, in general, can not maintain a healthy long-term relationship. Or, it can be intentionally keeping the relation(s) sort term. There can be several reasons for this situation.
FOr example, she never feels the satisfaction she seeks in relations. No, I am not talking about sexual satisfaction itself but emotionally and/or mentally.
Sexual and/or financial expectations are also another condition. Unfortunately, this is a fact in the World we are living in. Some people have other drives in their lifestyles. While men like to be after women, mostly, for sex; women prefer Money. Or financially secure.
So they just skip to another relationship when they acquire what they can from their partners. Sorry but true.
For these reasons, well-established connections are important. And she needs to keep the next partner ready when it is time.
To have someone ready for her all the time is important and monkey branching provides what is necessary.
The second reason for monkey branching is, it Works as a rebound relation. In a situation that things do not work well in relation, she prepares the conditions for the next relationship.
She can be doing this intentionally or unintentionally but the purpose of monkey branching is to avoid emotional destruction after break up.
In any condition, whatever the reason is, I can say that if you are being monkey branched person, it means that your partner gave up upon you.
On the other side, if it is you who is monkey branching, then your partner is not for you.
It means that there is no more emotional connection anymore between you and her.
Is Monkey Branching Cheating?
According to my opinion, yes it is. Although it is in a gray area for some people, if a woman is flirting with multiple guys, it does not matter if they have sex or not, it is another level of relationship. And she will break up with you sooner or later.
Cheating is not only a sexual activity that happens with one of the partners and a third party.
It is also involving any kind of flirting, teasing, meet-ups, and any other activity to line the next relation.
A new kind of connection is established.
And, worse, this connection can be with many other people at the same time to have multiple choice.
An honest and respectful relation requires communication. If there are problems, they should be solved with a mutual understanding.
However, instead of discussion, if she decides to replace her partner and seeks another one while she is still in relation. This is monkey branching.
Do not be surprised how quickly she found someone. You have been monkey branched.
Of course, she can be practicing monkey branch, not because of bad relationship but character.
Jumping from one relationship to another is the lifestyle she is used to. The psychology of her can be unstable and probably she has low self-esteem.
Or simply taking advantage of the guys she is dating. I don’t want to sound mean but there are girls like this.
Who does Monkey Branching?
You may be in a relationship with a narcissistic person even if you could not recognize her trait at the beginning. Narcissists are usually very charming and charismatic and also don’t show their bad side right away.
The point is, she always wants to be
Your relation started like a fairy tale.
You were happy to have a girl like her and proud of yourself to have such a beautiful girl.
Let me ask you something…
Did she flirt or tease a lot you before the relationship started?
Were you hanging out in cafes or parties occasionally?
You found her on a dating app and she was the one contacting you.
Well, if you answer some of these questions positively, she was just monkey branching someone else.
SIGNS OF MONKEY BRANCHING
Spending more time on the phone
The phone is the easiest way of communication with other people. It is also a very practical way of meeting new people. Beİng all the time in texting and conversation with others can be a sign.
Especially if she is behaving secretively about them to you. Not mentioning who she is chatting with and about what.
I agree that there should be some personal area even between couples, if time spent on the phone is too much, it is a bad sign.
Also, the phone gives the opportunity to keep in conversation with multiple people.
What does it mean? It means that, when you break up, she will choose the best available candidate she was keeping as an alternative.
How about other alternatives? Ah! They will still be alternatives and she will keep flirting with them.
Keeping the phone all the time closed to her, even in the bathroom during poo time or shower, not sharing phone password private, turning it off during sleep, and so on. Too much privacy is suspicious.
Test her; in case you worry about her actions. Make an excuse and ask if it is ok to use her phone to make a call or check your mails. If she rejects suddenly and persistently and gets a bit nervous something is going on. Even if she gives the phone but looks uncomfortable, again it is suspicious. If she doesn’t let you be alone with her phone, there can be something she is hiding.
This is also related to the first sign. If you somehow find out she is on dating sites and/or using dating apps, this is a very important clue you are being monkey branched.
If you mention it, she can say that she was using it before your relationship. However, if the application(s) is still on phone, then why keep those apps?
Check out her last activity on site where possible.
If you wanna test her, create a fake account. However, be careful, you will give her a reason to accuse you of several reasons.
Dating sites are not obviously for job seeking.
Having way so much ex
Well, everyone has
a few ex relations. Although there is no standard number of relations, being continuous with another one without a break is a sign of the practice of monkey branching.
There is usually a rebound time after a relationship which gives the person get rid of emotional destruction.
However, if she started another relationship right after a breakup and if you somehow became aware of it, be cautious.
Yes, you are a special person but you may not be so special to her. If she monkey branched other guys, you will be too.
you were maybe waiting for an opportunity to date her. When she is free, that moment for a reason she chose you. You were one of the other alternatives of other guys too who she is still probably in touch.
Less time with you
If she is spending less time with you than she spends with her friends, it is another warning. Joining activities, events, nights out with friends more often than you can be an attempt to extend her circle of potential relations.
This kind of activity also gives a chance to flirt with different guys or even dates.
And this is not something to discuss from the point of her view. She is just meeting friends. She should have the freedom to have some independence to meet friends.
And you probably won’t know many of them.
A monkey branching person usually has low self-esteem and guilty. In every opportunity such as you miss her call, she will accuse you of cheating on her.
You will be blamed for being with another girl at that moment and didn’t answer her call.
Even at a night out, she will say you checked out a girl and easily start a fight.
Her main purpose here is to make you always feel guilty and suppressed. So, you can be dominated all the time and can’t argue with her about her conversations with others.
She all the time compares you with others
You are all the time doing not enough. Mr.x buys flowers every day for his girlfriend
Mr.Y takes his girlfriend to fancy restaurants every diner.
Another guy kisses her girlfriend with passion all the time in front of people.
Simply, she is lowering your level and destroying your self-esteem.
Bottomline:You are being monkey branched. Now what?
Most probably you are not the victim of her behavior. You were just her number one choice right after her break up and bets on you were better than other guys. So your alternatives are already ready and being evaluated already.
I know it is hard to accept this but if you are dating a girl who practices monkey branching, it doesn’t matter how you feel about her and how good your relation started.
She doesn’t respect you and your relation.
If she is monkey branching you, actually she does not want to be
with you. She can be currently with you for some obvious benefits. Benefit can be your circle of friends, financially good for her, and so on.
In the end, if things are starting to change, behaviors are different, do not ignore the signs. Pay attention to red flags.